Life is unfolding perfectly

I received a comment on my last entry: “Hope this finds you well.... I read your post and thought of the quote ‘Jump and the net will appear’.... so how was the net?” It’s not the first time I’ve heard this, and in fact, I have carried that statement around with me for years. It was that belief which propelled me toward a change.

So, the net. What does it look like?
A small, quaint, rental appeared without much search or struggle. In fact, the owner of the cottage told me he had chosen us and did my son (the deciding factor) like the place? There was some money in the bank from selling my house to keep us afloat, even given the compromise in the selling price. I paid off loans and medical bills, and still had enough to live on frugally when GoodSage wasn’t paying its owners. I’ve done some freelance but mostly taken time to adapt to a new life in a new place. I now sport short, silver hair (low maintenance) — a gift from my mother’s genetic pool. I drive an old, reliable Lexus that is paid off. I go to the gym, to my shop, and occasionally into San Francisco to see friends. I go to movies alone or with Cheney and occasionally I go out for dinner or wine with friends. Life is easy and simple at this point. And I am aware that it is evolving into something new I cannot yet see.

The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anaïs Nin

Cancer, a catalyst for change.

My house has sold and I’m moving to the bay area. I’m not sure of where, but somehow, this move will work out. Davis, and my home, are too comfortable and completely uncomfortable. Life here has become too small, static and familiar. I want movement forward and I have the distinct feeling that can’t happen without stepping off the edge, or jumping without a parachute.
The house I live in was my parent’s home for years. It was a safe place to land and raise my kids at a time when we needed it. Now, with the two oldest boys gone, we have outgrown the need for this safe haven. I’m packing light and leaving behind things from my past—physically and metaphorically. Cheney is rolling with this as well as any 16-year-old can. He is more adaptable than he knows and change, exposure to something new, will be good for him.

Completion.

Today is the last day of radiation. I am truly grateful for the care I have had, and the people I have met during this last 7 weeks. It's been a wild ride...

Your crisis is the initiation into the fullness of your SELF.
Marianne Williamson

Advice.

Take it or leave it, it's free. Just a few things I wanted to pass along (from my experience) to those who are about to start chemo, have just begun, or have a friend/family heading down this road. Please, if you have things to add from your experience, let's keep this list going for future reference.
Chemo survival products:
Tom’s Baking Soda Toothpaste and a really soft toothbrush
-The baking soda seems to help with the sore mouth and funky-tongue taste.
Lip balm and Sunscreen (really, duh!)
Annie's Organic Mac and Cheese
-Few things taste good, trust me, I tasted everything. But the texture of this seems to be soothing and the flavor is mild
Don't even attempt salad dressing (vinegar) or tomato-based products--blech!
SOFT kleenex and T.P
-Have I gone too far here? Chemo can make for sore orifice's--'nuf said.

Hat or Scarf?
My preference was a wig plus hat, but summer is coming and the wig is going to be nasty! I'm not a scarf-person, never could pull off that look, and when I did, I felt like chemo-girl...always yanking it back in place on that slippery noggin. Hats—love 'em. Have one by Sungard, 100% cotton and cool newsboy style, it's my daily cover of choice. We must maintain style, right? Baseball hats and sunglasses are always good, and a good brim will save you.

Hair...personal preference.
Buzz it short—you are having chemo, not suffering from mange. That scraggly, falling stuff will only depress you and others. Bald is beautiful.

Radiation
This $5 product tested better (really, my doctor told me) than the expensive prescription stuff for radiation-burned skin. Keeps the itching and discomfort under control.
-Calendula ointment, lotion or gel by Boiron (get it at your local health food store-yeh!)

Healers.

I was recently asked about the healers I have listed on my blog, or more specifically, Teresa and Meghan Bowen.
Teresa owns The Bo Tree, a yoga studio in Davis where I practice yoga. She is encouraging, generous, and committed to the elimination of cancer in my body. Teresa, a disciple of alternative healing, is a practitioner of Color puncture. Colorpuncture involves focusing colored light on acupuncture (and other) points on the skin using a hand-held light tool with specially designed, interchangeable glass rods which emit different colors of light through a focused tip. Each color consists of different wavelength frequencies of light, which communicates different energetic information. Apparently, scientists are now discovering that light is actually the medium by which cells communicate and it is at the very basis of many body functions. This system is believed to energize powerful healing impulses in our physical and energy bodies. Teresa has not only opened my eyes in educating me on this practice, she has generously given me many colorpuncture sessions over the course of my cancer treatments to facilitate healing.
Meghan, Teresa’s daughter, is a teacher at The Bo Tree. I am not even sure she is aware of the affect she has had on me as a healer. There have been numerous times when I would drag myself to class without the energy level to participate fully, though my commitment to the practice was present. During vinyasa flow, I could not always finish the sequences as my energy level was compromised. As well, my mind can wander and (rather than being present) I get stuck on an array of emotionally draining topics. Perhaps sensing my physical or emotional state (and possibly not even conscious of it), Meghan has placed her hands on me as I retreated to child's pose or savasana, causing my tears to flow. This is usually quite surprising to me having had little indication I was holding on to the stuff that has poured out in this healing release.
It's all good and I am grateful to both of them.

Metamorphosis.

met·a·mor·pho·sis [met-uh-mawr-fuh-sis]
–noun, plural -ses [-seez]
Pronunciation.
1. Biology. a profound change in form from one stage to the next in the life history of an organism, as from the caterpillar to the pupa and from the pupa to the adult butterfly.
2. a complete change of form, structure, or substance, as transformation by magic or witchcraft.
3. any complete change in appearance, character, circumstances, etc.
4. a form resulting from any such change.